THIS ONE IS EVEN BETTER!!!
Friday, December 21, 2007
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Britney Spears' sister Jamie Lynn Knocked up at 16!!
Like shit isn't bad enough for Britney Spears. You would think losing her kids to douchey K-Fed, gaining some weight, going absolutley apeshit and shaving her head, plus partying like a rockstar, that maybe just maybe she might catch a break. Nope! appears her 16 year old sister Jami Lynn Spears has been playing "Just the Tip" with her 19 year old boyfriend Casey Aldridge.
And to top it off her ass is preggers! So I guess it's starbucks, McDonald's, & secret sex rooms in Jamie Lynn's future. Jamie Lynn is well known as the charcter "Zoe" on the Nichleodeon TV Show "Zoe 101". She said to have moved in with Alridge or as we're calling him "Federidge" and somwhere in between then and now he forgot to pull out. Dumb shit! Ain't you never heard a no rubber?!
Oh by the way:
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Monday, December 17, 2007
Wallmart Sucks
We've all heard stories of how bad Wallmart sucks. everything from the outrageous under paid illegal imagrant workers to the fact that this All-American store sells 98% of "made in China" products. OK so I think I broke record last night. It was like 10:40pm and I had to run to Wallmart, which is 5 minutes from my house. Keep in mind all I need was three cans of white chunked chicken (don't ask). I pull in the parking lot at 10:48. I walk into Wallmart not suprised that it's a ghost town on a sunday night. I walk down to the Isle, grab 3 cans of chicken and head for the Check out line...10:52. Low and behold Of all the 30 sum registers who's suprised that they only have 2 of them up and running! And to top it off both the register people are swear to god fuckin' douchebags! and there's like 8 people in each line. I'm cool still until I get into line and of course the ass munch at the front is that typical fuck-off stool sample that insists somethings on sale when it's not simply because he picked it up from the shelf from where some little brat faggot misplaced it. So they argue bag and fourth about the price until finally the ass bag decides he doesn't want it now...11:15. Ass bag checks out, things seem ok the next 2 or 3 customers seemed fine even though douchebag rings up items as fast as molasses.
11:32pm...One more lady in front of me, seemed cheery gave me that "I wish I was at home snorting heroine and licking my dogs anus" eye roll / smile expression. She's getting her items scanned, shit like those 20lb bags of dog food, small microwave, and a whole bunch of other useless shit, and then it hits...douchebag tells her the price and she doesn't have enough. At this point I'm irritated and my infamous smart ass mumbling starts. As I watch Douchebag and broke ass go about trying to figure out what to keep what to not, and how many scenarios they can come up with for this stupid jackass to get as much as she can on this trip, I am now coming up with scenarios on how to be entertained during all this. Everything from setting them on fire to beating them with my cans of chicken. After all this Broke Ass buys the Microwave and dog food and leaves everything else...11:40.
Now I'm pissed and as Douchebag rings me up all I can do is concentrate to not strangle this retard and piss on his corpse! I pay and of course As I'm leaving the midnight security doorman who is at least 900 years old wabbles on over to me and asks me to see my receipt! "It's three cans of fuckin' chicken for fucks sake here!" I shouted and threw him my receipt. I got into my car and unleashed a fury of every cuss word and satanic phrase of scripture I could think of as I realized it's now 11:49! 57 minutes of waiting in line for three son-of-a-bitching cans of god damn chicken it took me 4 minutes to get! There are two people I Hope I never meet in this world 1.) an executive for WallMart or WallGreens (Cause I'll stomp a mudhole in their fuckin' asses just to feel better) and 2.) Debt collectors (cause there all loud and proud over the phone, I meet one in person I'm gonna insert my boot right up their ass!)
Too many fuckin' douchebags in this world!
And on a last minute note, I must admit I am a tool for standing in line for 57 minutes!
Monday, December 10, 2007
Retarded Policeman Episodes 3 & 4
Before you go making comments here's a small message from the creators:
Before you leave mean comments, just know that our friend Ponce (the Cop) is an awesome and talented young dude who loves performing and making light of his Down syndrome. He's a smart and funny guy, and has complete awareness of his actions and decisions. And we all had a great time shooting a few episodes of "Retarded Policeman!"
Check out Ponce's Video Response:
Response from Ponce
Friday, December 7, 2007
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Rumor Willis the secrets out
So I figured out what bugs me about Rumor Willis. She's fuckin' U.L.G.Y. ugly hey hey you ugly. I mean if it was either her or a badger on fire rumaging through a dumpster I'd honeslty have to admit dumpster diving is a possiblity.
I guess it could be worse...she could be Amy Winehouse!
American Idol finalist offer BJs!
We’re not sure what’s worse for former American Idol finalist Jessica Sierra:
That she has referred to police officers who arrested her as “crackers,” or that she openly offered to give said crackers a blow job?
Vest courtesy of Vern Troyer
The train wreck of a singer called her Aunt Sheila on the Monday after her Saturday night arrest for disorderly intoxication, violation of probation and obstruction of justice. According to TMZ, though, Sierra had no idea why she was even in jail.
Jessica told her aunt: “I don’t even know what they arrested me for… I didn’t fight nobody but the police, little stupid f-cking crackers!”
Blake Fielder-Civil couldn’t have said it better himself.
Celebrity Baby names
OK so I know the celebrities do some fucked up things, but some of these names you can just tell who's kids are going to end up drug addicts, who will end up rockerstars, party animal tramps, acid freaks, or probably grow up and kill their parents for giving them such a screwed up name!
Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin: Baby daughter Apple and son Moses
A fruit and a profit
Matt & Annette Lauer: Baby boy Thijs
How the fuck do you ven pronounce that!
Alice Kim & Nicolas Cage: Baby son Kal-el Coppola
Superman fan much?
Shannyn Sossaman & Dallas Clayton: Baby son Audio Science
SERIOUSLY? These two aren't even high enough on the celebrity food chain to name their kid such a fucked up name. If he doesn't grow up to be a DJ he's fucked!
Toni Braxton & Keri Lewis: Baby son Diezel Ky
now imagine he grows up short, cracked out and skinny...and his name is Diezel
Heidi Klum & Seal: Baby son Johan Riley Fyodor Taiwo
okay first two decent last two? is he fuckin' japanese!?
Jools Norton & Jamie Oliver: Baby daughter Daisy Boo
with a name like boo she better not grow up ugly and scary lookin!
Drea de Matteo and Shooter Jennings: Baby daughter Alabama Gypsy Rose
I see her future a desert dwelling gypsy thief of flowers!
Beth Riesgraf & Jason Lee: Baby son Pilot Inspektor
I love Jason Lee but LOOK AT WHAT YOU NAMED YOUR KID! Christ he's fucked for life!
Tonya Linette Lewis & Spike Lee: Baby daughter Satchel
SPIKE! DUDE! you just named your kid after a fucking sack that someone carries on their waist!
Claudia Schiffer & Matthew Vaughn: Baby son Caspar
caspar caspar? great nice good one dumbshits
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Gillian Gibbons: 'I got more of an adventure than I bargained for'
Gillian Gibbons, the teacher jailed in Sudan for allowing her pupils to name a teddy bear "Mohamed", arrived back in Britain today and declared: "I never imagined this would happen. I am just an ordinary primary school teacher."
"I am very sorry to leave Sudan. I had a fabulous time. It is a beautiful place and I had a chance to see some of the countryside. The Sudanese people I found to be extremely kind and generous and until this happened I only had a good experience."
Read more...
And in true fashion of Notorious Apparel we give you our tribute and support of Gillian Gibbons!
CLICK THE PIC TO SEE MORE ITEMS AND PURCHASE!!
Monday, December 3, 2007
Warning!
If you don't have a sense of humor don't play this video! I'm serious!
Told you, got to admit that some funny shit no matter who you are?
No Big Suprise
Hell If this is the direction Tara Reids heading, it may be an actual cum back seeing as the movie business has not been so good. I'm sure she'll kick ass as a host of a party filled with street walkers.
Pictures that Tickle me in that funny place
Wallmart hits panic mode with the announcement of the elimination of dumpster babies, and is forced to prepare for a 85% loss of future Wallmart Shoppers. Don't worry Wallmart execs there is always welfare recipients.
300 men slipped, fell, and died on the same floor in the same day causing OSHA to develop in record time a new cautionary floor sign for such an occasion.
For more funny pics like these check out the www.dailyhaha.com
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